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13 November, 2020

Being elfish is a hobbit thats hard to break

G’day Tropicairnians. I was having a major brain leaking episode regarding the life challenging problem of what would it be like and whether it would be better to be a Hobbit or an Elf for 24 hours.

By Wayne Marshall

We discussed this huge topic at the big green box on Monday night and at times it got a little lively.

Since it is an extremely serious and life defining subject, you can always count upon Wayne’s World to tackle the biggest and most divisive issues of the day.

Now this is not a decision to be made lightly. The life of a hobbit is to be a tenderer (gardener for you less middle-earth educated) of the earth. You care and obsess over your garden, potatoes or whatnots and allowing them to grow to their fullest potential with your love.

A hobbit gets first, second and third breakfast with a total of 6 plus meals a day while being able to wander around bare foot (big as they are) drinking ale (my preferred choice is Guinness) and not hit your head on light fixtures (I have enjoyed this all my life) at the Ye Old Green Dragon Tavern.

Now if an elf is your choice, then you have to decide what type, North Pole elf, Wood elf, Dark elf or a High elf (at the snobby higher end and always on horseback).

If you are into pointy ears then elfision is for you, as a Santa’s North Pole elf you get to make toys, shovel reindeer poo and drink hot chocolate all day.

Now the other elves are warriors so that that does not appeal to me as it all sound likes too much hard work.

So for this doorman I like the idea of hobbitry, plus I love ale and food.

So live life to the fullest, sometimes go with 


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