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20 November, 2020

Wayne's World: Squares are smaller than triangles: Pythagoras proves it

Hi Tropicairnians, Here is a topic that goes straight to the heart of my huge belly, toasted sangas.

By Wayne Marshall

 Now we all have our own special toasties that we make, order or beg for.

For me it’s every Saturday and Sunday morning, crispy bacon, tomato, cheese and grilled onion. One with barbeque sauce the other with sweet chilli sauce and most importantly they must be cut in triangle quarters that I share with the store front team.

 Hold the raging platypus, did I say triangle quarters (mmm at what I just wrote) yes I did. The apparently knowledgeable people at the big green box on Monday night said there is no difference in volume of sangas if cut in square or triangle quarters.

 Now this is where the Society for the Science of the Gut and I are in agreeance, against all the other square minded sauce dribbling fools.

 Way back when John Wayne invented the removable head, I was invited (at a risk to my own personal safety) to be involved in a huge scientific experiment where one short fat dwarf ate square cut quarters and I ate the triangle quarter cut toasties.

Now this was a strongly fought battle but after 16 toasties my guts were full, the other dwarf managed to eat 24 toasties which proves that when you cut them in triangle quarters you get definitely more sandwich.

 Don’t try this experiment at home or you may end up with six brothers singing Hi Ho, Hi Ho, it’s off to work we go. 

Stay cool and remember triangles are bigger than squares, and Pythagoras the original Greek member of the first Big Bang Theory devised a formula to prove that so.


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